Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Day Before Thanksgiving

White Chocolate Cranberry Macadamia Nut Cookies

White Chocolate Cranberry Macadamia Nut Cookies


1 cup unsalted butter
1-1/2 cups brown sugar, packed
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2-1/4 cups flour
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup macadamia nuts
1 cup white chocolate chips
1-1/2 cups sweetened, dried cranberries

Cooking Instructions

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.

2. Sift together flour, soda and salt in medium bowl. Set aside. Using a hand mixer or stand mixer, cream butter in a large mixing bowl until light and fluffy. Add sugar and vanilla; stir to combine. Add eggs one at a time and beat until combined. Gradually add flour 1/2 cup at a time.

3. Fold in the macadamia nuts, white chocolate chips and dried cranberries.

4. Drop by heaping teaspoon on a baking sheet 1-1/2 inches apart.

5. Bake for 9 to 11 minutes or until golden brown. Cool on wire rack.

 These cookies look awesome I think for this time of year!  Enjoy!

So....Im still alive.  Some things have gotten easier.  Im not afraid anymore.  For a long time I was so afraid at dark...fine during the daylight hours...but at dark I got scared of every noise and just terrified to be alone.  Now...Im fine.  Noises dont scare me...I walk around the house, even in the dark, and have no fear....this is huge.  I feel confident in this small way...not that nothing could happen...I mean people do get robbed and worse,but you know...chances I am ok. 
Somehow...I have been JUST able to sort of pay the bills??!!!  I mean...the heat is still tv works, I have internet and a land line and electricity and running yea!!!! (For now)  I found out I qualify for a free cell friend calls it an Obama phone.  So, I even have a cell....although it rarely works..always says no service!  But beggers cant be choosers......and hopefully it will work in an emergency...which is what it is for. Thank God for my keeps me busy...reading and I have been getting tons of movies to watch there as well.  My cat is a soul around me to help a bit with the loneliness...but the loneliness is the worst thing of all. 
I need a car so badly.....a car is first on my list of things to cannot imagine how hard it is to not have transportation in an area where there is no busline...I just feel so trapped and isolated.  It is very very limiting as to how I can entertain myself as well with no car....if I had a car (assuming I had gas money) I could go to my quilt clubs, my book clubs, and I was thinking of possibly joining a choir....or some such groups.....but I find I cant even get to the grocery store.  I do have a friend who takes me when she can to the grocery store.  And there is a local food pantry that has helped meet the needs left after the grocery money is all gone...(which is fast!---man, groceries are expensive arent they???)  Also, a Godsend, I found out a qualify for free rides to all my doctor appointments....which is also HUGE!  I am so thankful to be able to get to my appointments...for awhile I wasnt sure how that was going to work.  I finally have a therapist and a psychiatrist--as of yesterday.... who will, fingers crossed, hopefully be able to help me with some much needed medical therapy and prescriptions.  I have been without medical therapy for this WHOLE my crisis and I have SO needed help.  So, I have some HOPE now in that way...finally...thank you God....
This is a time where sometimes I think I have little to be Thankful for this Thanksgiving...and then look at all the blessings I just wrote about!!!!  You know, these blessings are better than fancy trips or material possessions....or whatever in the past I may have dreamed for.....these are life blessings ....meat and sustaining...and although its been humbling and hard to find this help...its there!...  Someone from a church group actually has come over and started putting plastic all over my windows in the inside for the Winter...they are coming back to do the cool is that?  And he got my clothes dryer working!!! I wasnt sure what I was going to do...I was picturing hanging my wet clothes in the freezing cold and bringing them inside as stiff sculptures....I am extremely excited about my dryer working!!
  So, I thank you God for all the people and the blessings that you have put in place to help me this year.  I think too, of all the people hurt by Sandy this year...and so I know I am not any means. 
Here's hoping you all have a wonderful and blessed Thanksgiving...and that you can SEE your many blessings...because we all have reasons to be happy and feel blessed...we all do....sometimes you just have to look at things a bit different is all....have a bit different expectations and learn to see the silver linings...and the glass half full....Like I have always told my children.....attitude is everything.  While I am say that, I still do struggle each day to remember that.....but it is so true.  We have the power to feel however we want to feel.  Hopeful, happy, blessed, loved and gracious......if we choose!

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